dirty~d~

Resident nudist
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Apr 17, 2002
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As if having your precious Chefs LOSE to the Bengals (like they're going to lose to the Raiders :p) wasn't bad enough, I wrote a little something for ya. ;)

As sung to Elvis' In The Ghetto... ehem...

As the fur flies
On a cold and gray Missouri mornin'
A poor little naive kitten is born
In a basement
And the angels cry
Cause if there's one thing that they know is true
Is that there's a single man named Lou
In his bedroom

People, don't you understand
A man needs a companion
Or he'll end up blind with hairy old palms someday
Take a look at you and me
Are we too lucky to see
Do we help him find a mate
Or do we buy him lotion

Well the night comes
And the poor little kitten with the short hair coat
Plays with a ball of yarn that fell from a tote
In a basement
And Lou's hunger burns
Cause he went all day with his pants too tight
But he tries to resist
And he tries to fight it
In his bedroom

Then at last in desperation
Lou gives into his urge
Lays on his bed, unzips his pants
Closes his eyes as the DVD plays
And the kitten dies

As the flies gather 'round another dead kitten
Lou starts to fall asleep with his :scream: in his hand
In the darkness

And he starts to snore
On a cold and gray Missouri mornin'
Another little naive kitten is born
In a basement


An MP3 is in the works. :p

GO RAIDERS!!
 

Kav

Crash Master
Damn Yankees
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Jan 20, 2001
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Good God that's bad.

:eek:
 

Kav

Crash Master
Damn Yankees
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Jan 20, 2001
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this is true... ;)
(hey that rymes)
 

zio

Mr. Atlas
Jul 28, 2000
2,291
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At first "Just for Lou" had me thinking maybe she found him a date. :p

It's okay, Lou. Every crowd needs a "creepy uncle who's not married & never brings a date" type.
 

Kav

Crash Master
Damn Yankees
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Jan 20, 2001
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Originally posted by zio
Every crowd needs a "creepy uncle who's not married & never brings a date" type.

Hey now I'm working on that my self. :uh: :confused:
 
B

biglou

Oh man, you're just evil, ~d~. I knew I liked ya for some reason. :p

Sunday, 3:15PM CST, Arrowhead Stadium, Kansas City, MO. Showtime! :aj:
 

Smit-Dog

Mi. Trail Riders
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Oct 28, 2001
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I can almost visualize the dark, musty room in the basement, walls lined with paneling from the '70s, filled with stacks of stale and mildewy Hustler magazines.

Yeeccchhh! :scream:
 

dirty~d~

Resident nudist
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Apr 17, 2002
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Care to wager on Sunday's game? The Raiders are on a high now... or just high depending on what paper you read. :eek:
 

XRpredator

AssClown SuperPowers
Damn Yankees
Aug 2, 2000
13,510
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~d~, I hate to say it, but I don't think Mirer has it in him . . .

I mean, come on! Rick Mirer! sheesh!
 

dirty~d~

Resident nudist
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Apr 17, 2002
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True Pred. Very true. How sad is it when a team has to rely on Rick Mirer to pull them through the rest of the season? :ugg: Although, if the Bengals can pull off a win against the Mighty Chiefs then there's hope for us underdawgs yet. :confused:
 

dirty~d~

Resident nudist
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Apr 17, 2002
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Lou isn't on my bad side. He's just a fan of the wrong team. :p
 

Patman

Pantless Wonder
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Dec 26, 1999
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Look at the bright side. If Lou kills off enough kittens maybe he'll have to resort to Chicago squirrels! :laugh:
 
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