Malaysian English 101

jeffd

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#1
Who says Malaysian English is teruk(Malay: bad). Just see below -
It is simple,short,concise, straight-to-point, effective etc.

The English did invent the English Language, but they cannot use it economically when communicating their intentions. Compare these phrases that Malaysians and Britons use to say the same thing:

So, why make things so confusing and waste of money when you are on a long distance call. Make it snappy.

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the
other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hallo, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY.
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kews

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on
me.
Malaysians: No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be
possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (while pointing at door) Can or not?

WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don't-waaaant!

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I
understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! lower your
voice, I am trying toconcentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shaddap lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for
some time. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the
moment.
Malaysians: Die, lah!!

-jeffd
 

jeffd

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#4
There are a few more things here that strike me as odd.

A cell phone is called a "hand Phone" or "H/P" for short. I thought you used your hands for pretty much all phones, lol.

Spelling over here is funny too. Lots of permutations of English.

Taxi = Teksi
Coffee = Kopi
Boutique = Butik

Don't ask for the "check" or the "ticket" or the "tab" at a restaurant or bar. You'll get that look a dog gives you when it is confused and tilts its' head sideways. You must ask for the "bill".

Diet Coke? Forget it. It is "Coke Light" here.

It is a different world over here for sure.

-jeffd
 

GETMETOCA

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#5
Good thing you clued me in.  The next time I'm in Malysia, I will know to ask for GETMEKOPI and Captain Morgan and Coke Light! ;)
 

biglou

#6
The "Kopi" reminded me of the Phillipines. They have no "F" in their alphabet, so when they speak English, they substitute the "F" with a "P". It takes some getting used to for sure! Seemed like there was another letter or two that they didn't have, either, but I can't remember which ones.

Another interesting thing about "The P.I.", the word "Yes" is spelled "OO". Pronounced, "Oh-oh". Or, interestingly enough, represented by raising your eyebrows twice, as if saying, "OO"! No foolin'.
 

GETMETOCA

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#9
Big Guy Steve said:
stay away from fashion shows.
and DON'T go near the Prime Minister! :)
Yanno, if you guys ever stop watching movies like Zoolander 6 times to gather all these pertinent little factoids, you'd deprive the rest of us of all this knowledge :) I had to ask Pred to 'splain what Whyzee was talkin' about :think: but I'm solid now!

:thumb:

HOWEVER!  You would be proud to know that I only watched that OTHER movie with Catherine Zeta Jones and Sean Connery ONCE to remember that it was set in Kuala Lampur Malaysia........but I can't remember the name of the movie. :ugg:
 

Neil Wig

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#11
No, it was the movie where Sean Connery is a high end theif. They are stealing money from the stock exchange, or banking system, or something like that.

And the answer is.....Entrapment.
 

jeffd

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#12
I never saw that movie - but I will tell you this...
Censorship is alive and well here in Malaysia. I went to go see "The Rundown" starring "The Rock" and any scenes with the "F" word or potential nudity are censored out. The censors used a butcher knife to do their edits because there was no effort made to make the censoring appear to be seamless. It was just whacked out of the film! Crude, but effective.

-jeffd
 

Jaybird

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#13
The sound of an order of lomein hitting the floor in Malaysia:

"Prop"