truespode

Moderator / Wheelie King
Jun 30, 1999
7,978
249
Over labor day I went to see my Grandmother on my dad's side (her and I are really close). She is dying of cancer and is in home hospice. After leaving I decided to forego on Dirtweek and use my vacation time to go up and spend some more time with her before she goes. However, I kept up the idea I may fly and come in for the weekend at least.

Now I find out my Grandfather on my mom's side is going into kidney failure. At his age his kidney's should be operating at 60% but last week they were at 11% and this week down to 10%. Looks like he may go before Grandma will :(

My Grandmother is ready but Gramps is not. Grandma has prepared for it and has everything sorted out from who gets what antique to who carries on what end of the casket.

Grandpa on the other hand is refusing to go on dyalisis and basically refusing to acknowledge there is anything wrong. Of course, as long as he keeps drinking away the pain he'll continue to do it (his liver is shot already). It's almost as if he wants to go but is not comfortable while Grandma doesn't want to go but is comfortable with it all.

Anyway, I'm out for DW but now it is for more than just to spend some quality time with my Grandma. The good news is they both live within 10 miles of each other in Michigan.

Ivan
 

Pokie

Administrator
May 7, 1999
1,698
1
Galena, IL
sorry to hear that Ivan..... make the best of your visit....
 

Treejumper

2 wheeled idiot
Damn Yankees
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Sep 9, 2000
2,987
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Sorry Ivan! Hope you get to spend the quality time before they go or better yet i hope they improve so you have lots more quality time with them.
 

truespode

Moderator / Wheelie King
Jun 30, 1999
7,978
249
Originally posted by oldguy
Make the best of your time with them because we don't get second chances

I agree. I guess the thing that bothers me the most is that my Grandmother did everything she could up to the point to where she saw that it was a defeating purpose. Even still she sticks to her ridgid diet. She always had a great attitude and actually did not want me to miss DW.

My Grandfather on my mom's side could have avoided all of this if he just would have stopped drinking. He is a good man but loves the drink too much (mostly Jack Daniels and the like).

But... you have to let each of them live their life the way they want and support them in their time of need. It certainly will be a stressful few months coming up.

Thanks for your ears/eyes :)

Ivan
 

Green Horn

aka Chip Carbone
N. Texas SP
Jun 20, 1999
2,563
0
Sorry to hear you won't be at DW this year. I know exactly how it is to lose grandparents when you're not a kid anymore. I can't say it was any easier being older than if it would have happened when I was 10 yrs old. I lost 3 of mine in 2 yrs time(2 were just 6 weeks apart). The things that I thought about the most were being upset because I'd been used to having them around ever since I could remember. Yet I was also greatful for being able to know them for so long. Some kids never even meet their grandparents.

Enjoy the final moments with them Ivan. One of the more meaningful/ humbling/ flattering experiences I've ever had was to be one of 8 or so family members at my Grandmother's side as she passed on.
 

nikki

Moto Junkie
Apr 21, 2000
5,802
1
Damnit Ivan, sorry to hear all the bad news. :(

We'll miss you at DW - hope to see you next year!
 

CAL

Sponsoring Member
Jul 19, 2000
2,032
0
Hang in there Ivan.  If there is any way you can talk him into dyalisis, do it.  And get him on the list for a transplant.  My grandmother was on dyalisis for 3 years....and don't get me wrong...it was terrible!  But she ended up receiving a kidney transplant and was better off than she had been in 10 years.

If you need anything, let us know.

 
 

truespode

Moderator / Wheelie King
Jun 30, 1999
7,978
249
Originally posted by CAL
If there is any way you can talk him into dyalisis, do it

My mother is going up there tomorrow to try and talk him into it. So far he has refused dyalisis. He doesn't want to give up his daily 5th yanno :(

Ivan
 

wrench

'00 Flappin' Fender [Ret]
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Jun 7, 2000
450
4
Sorry to hear the bad news buddy. Call me if you need to talk. Your ear has been there for me on several occassions ..... Let me know if I can help.


wrench
 

squeaky

Roosta's Princess
Damn Yankees
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Mar 28, 2003
2,561
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I'm so sorry to hear about your grandparents. My thoughts and best wishes are with you and your family in your time of need.

I hope all turns out well.
 

Tony Eeds

Godspeed Tony.
N. Texas SP
Jun 9, 2002
9,535
0
Ivan:

Sorry to hear about your situation, but you are correct in putting family first. They are an irreplaceable resource.

As you are well aware, words cannot fill the awkward silence of inadequacy felt by friends who do not know what to say.

If we can help ....
 

Danman

LIFETIME SPONSOR
Nov 7, 2000
2,211
3
We will mis ya at DW this year, but like it was said above. There is always next year. Family is important and you must do what you have to :(

Good Luck
 

KiwiBird

LIFETIME SPONSOR
Jan 30, 2000
2,386
0
Sorry to read the news Ivan, I was looking forward to meeting you. Spend the time well with your folks.
 

Chili

Lifetime Sponsor - Photog Moderator
Apr 9, 2002
8,062
15
Ivan,

Very sorry to hear about the situation with your grandparents. I hope your mom can convince your grampa to go for his dialysis. And I wish all of your family all the best.
 

Kawidude

D'oh!
LIFETIME SPONSOR
May 23, 2000
1,386
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Sorry to hear about this Ivan. Best wishes to you and your family.
 

LoriKTM

Super Power AssClown
Oct 4, 1999
2,220
6
New Mexico
Ivan, sorry to hear about your grandparents.  You and Jenny will be missed at DirtWeek, but there will be another DirtWeek next year.  Treasure the time with your family this year.
 
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