Door to Door salespeople...

[MXGirl230]

So Saturday Phil and I are outside cleaning our air filters. Both bikes are out and we have cleaning supplies scattered everywhere. A guy and a girl walk up our driveway and say hi, we say hi back. So the guy is like cool bikes, do you guys ride? (here's your sign). I almost said no they are the old guys behind us, we're just cleaning them for him...because he is unable to. I kept my mouth shut. Before either of us could throw our smart responses out to the guy he's like..so you race? Are you guys like pro or something? I look at him thinking...ok for 1. We live in a trailer park, if either of us were pro we would not be living in one 2. The trailer we live in is 20yrs old, the rest of the park is older...3. We would not be living in Holland, MI 4. We would not be cleaning the filters or working on the bikes ourselves. I kept my mouth shut and kept working on my filter...so while the guy looks at our bikes the girl rushes into her whole magazine sales deal. Phil is like oh I have seen this before, no we're not interested. They push on, cheaper than retail :blah: :blah: :blah: Phil is like, no not interested. I saw this when I was in college. OH this isn't the same thing...The girl shows phil the paper, yeah same thing...NO we're not interested. She continues, there's a motorcycle magazine in here. I was like no we already subscibe to several dirt bike magazines. We don't have street bikes anymore, so a motorcycle magazine is not of our interest right now. Well we have uh...dirt bike :bang: Before I could say anthing else, Phil stands up...that's all they needed they hitailed it out of there. Not sure why they took off, Phil was just standing up...oh well. I feel sorry for the other 500 lots here.
I absolutely hate door to door sales. I don't mind it when it's kids raising money for their school band (I was in band and I'll support that any day), field trips, etc. When it's adults going door to door I get irritated. Find a real job! Do not bug me at home to buy some stupid product. If I want it I'll contact you. I don't need you to tell me about a product. I lived this long without it, I can live another 23 years without it. Don't even get me started on the Rainbow Vacuum salesmen :pissed:
This is just me though, if anyone here is a door to door sales rep. and I offended you, I'm sorry. I don't like being bothered with stupid products and sales pitches.

 

[XRpredator]

grrr . . . don't get me started on the door to door guys . . . too late

First there's the foreign exchange students who feign just enough lack of skill with the english language to get you to feel sorry for them so you'll buy whatever this ginormous book that will help your kid with schoolwork. I did not happen to be home when the first guy showed up, my darling wife, who is kind hearted, was seated in the grass with this fellow. I basically ignored him as I entered my domicile. After I put my lunchpail away, I go back outside to see what is going on. "He's from Slobokia, and he's selling books."

"yes sir," he says with a slobokian accent, "These books will help your son with his homework. There is a lot of information in them"

"uh, he can look it up on the internet" I say. He continues with his spiel, and my wife, the kindhearted delicate flower that she is, seems to be leaning toward buying these stupid books because she feels sorry for the kid. This starts bringing out Angry Pred. Joe Slobokian starts to notice Angry Pred, and asks for a glass of water, since its hot out. I just leave him in the yard and let my wife deal with it. Finally he leaves.

Then there's "Team Kirby". Oh man, I've never been more pissed off in my entire life! First off, they knock on the door and the "manager" leaves the "salesperson" at my house. Again, my wife would probably bend to their will and buy whatever they are selling, only because she's a nice lady. Team Kirby is all kinds of pushy, telling me the vacuum costs about 2000 bucks. They can tell this will not fly with me, so the sales gal demonstrates a bit. yay. it sucks dirt, woohoo. "Now we'll knock x dollars off," she says.

"No," I say, and Angry Pred begins to rear his ugly head again. Team Kirby gal says "let me call Manager Guy and ask him blah blah blah" then she demonstrates some more. I say "Enough Demonstration. I want you out." "but we haven't shown you the shampoo . . ."

"OUT" I say. So she has to call Manager guy to come pick her up, and Manager guy is eyeing my gun cabinet, etc, in the living room, then he ignores Angry Pred and starts in on some more sales pitch. This only raises my ire some more. I did not sit the entire time. I think that my attitude finally sunk into Manager guy's thick skull, and he realized that maybe I would be opening said gun cabinet soon if he didn't leave.

in case you can't tell, I hate door to door salesmen.

 

[rickyd]

Well said, i want too add on the holy rollers too :blah: :blah: :blah:

Oh, the telemarketers, they call "Is Rick there??" i say "Yeah, let me go get him" put the phone down for about 5 minutes :laugh:

 

[Rich Rohrich]

I'd love to have a salesperson come knock on my door some time. :p

 

[jmics19067]

A couple of great stunts I have seen

My father a well educated, religious man with the patience of a Saint had invited some Born Agains into his house and talked religion and religious beliefs for like 5 hours until THEY had enough and was begging to get out. I was utterly amazed and was asking how could you take it, My father's reply was "they won't come back" and they haven,t yet it's been about 10 years.

Another good one I saw was when someone is trying to sell you something try and selll them something back. If they sell vacuum cleaners try and sell them life insurance have to make it convincing though and put them into the spot ..." you know going door to door in this day and age can be a scary thing you need to make sure your family is protected if something should happen to you"

 

[ellandoh]

i usually find out what theyre selling , then think of the largest company i can conjure up that sells their product and tell them i have 20 years there and if they can beat my price i'll take it

me "oh youre from mci............i have 20 years at AT&t if you can beat free unlimited calling ill take it"

mci " no , cant top that sorry to waste your time sir , goodbye"

me "thats ok , bye" :)

 

[xsnrg]

Yes, the Kirby pimp was by our neighborhood a couple years ago. He dropped off some girls on our street then went to lift some other hoes from one neighborhood to another. It was at least an hour before he came back to the girl at our place. By that time we had her vacuum the entire downstairs of our house and the sofa cushions. Figured we'd keep her too busy to talk numbers until he got back and then we told them both to leave. It is pretty cool when they deflate the couch cushions with that thing... but I'm fairly easily entertained.

 

[CRMXRCR]

Well, we had a couple of students few years back, also trying their best to sell the worst bunch of random crap they could find (by the looks of it) Anyway, my mom dad, brother and myself were sitting with them in the sitting room, pretending to be interested in their blah blah bleh blah. My mom found an excuse to leave, then my brother, me, and eventually my dad went 'to see where we've gone'. Soon as he got outside, we let our 3 Pitbull/staff/bullterrier crosses into the house, knowing they wouldn't attack these poor souls. They just stood there growling, with the sales people ****ting on our couches for about 10 minutes. My dad went back inside, asking them to leave, which they quite happily did.

 

[mc916]

I have a very large Rottweiler,she doesn't miss a thing that goes on around here.I haven't had to worry about salespeople,stray dog's,or thieve's since she's been around.Now if I could teach her to answer the phone and deal with the telemarketer's I'd have it made.

 

[ChopperDave]

If you get on the National do not call list, the telemarketers will stop!

 

[CaptainObvious]

We don't get the door-to-door morons in my neighborhood. Probably because there are only 1,000 or so people in our town.

 

[Tony Eeds]

Not exactly door to door, but they sell doors ... Time Share!

I have known a bunch of folks that caved to the pressure over the years.

I got into a religious descussion with a Hari Krishna (sp) once ... kinda funny now that I think about it. ;)

I'd love to have a salesperson come knock on my door some time.

Hee Hee, I've seen photos!

We don't get the door-to-door morons in my neighborhood. Probably because there are only 1,000 or so people in our town.

Dang, I thought all of Joursey was covered up with folks!

 

[CaptainObvious]

Shush! It’s a big secret, but Warren county NJ is fairly rural. Don’t tell anyone.

 

[XRpredator]

Dang, I thought all of Joursey was covered up with folks!

no, it's Jersey. There are a lot of covered up folks . . . ;)

 

[Rich Rohrich]

Jimmy Hoffa is in Junk's BBQ pit ;)

 

[Ryone]

In college, my buddy would always tell telemarketer's that he or I just died. I've also used the "yeah, lemme get him" and then put the phone down for about 5 minutes.

Another good one for J-Witnesses is to start talking to them about your religion. Most of them realize that 25 years of Christianity or Catholicism is hard to erase in one meeting.

Or, like Robin Williams said: When they knock on your door, answer it naked. When they ask if you've found Jesus, just say, "Nope, but ya wanna help me look for him?"

 

[bsmith]

I couldn't agree more to the Door to Door and Telemarketers.
I'm on the no call list and it's worked great! As per the D-to-D peeps my thought is I'm glad they are out working and trying to make a living rather then sit on their lazy acres and collect wellfare my taxes pay for.

I don't get many though since I'm rural, mainly guys selling ariel photos of the farm who only come around every 10 years. Well, bud someone else only comes around every 10 years and you just missed him.

I've done the Telemarking, yet business to business, back in 97 and it wasn't fun. I also sold Insurance and again not fun. It truely wakes you up to how some people are, but at least they are working, I'll give them that!

Now who needs some Amway :yikes:

 

[MXGirl230]

The door to door got so bad at my mom and dads house, they put a "no soliciters" sign on the front door. Haven't had one since..well one. When I still lived there this guy knocks and I answer..he starts going through his whole speech. I pointed to the sign, didn't say a word..He's lik "aww no ma'am, I'm not smokin' that's just my gum". I was like you want me to give you money for college when you can't even read? I shut the door. DIdn't see him ever again.

 

[billtx]

I don't like them but a least they are out working. It is a tough job with a lot of rejection.

 

[motometal]

I've thought up a few good comebacks for telemarketers, most of which I can't think of right now.

If they are selling something that requires electricity (including a phone, duh!) I tell them that we don't have electricity in Iowa yet. If they laugh, I yell at them.

Sometimes my wife and I will team up on them, the other person picking up the extension and making a static sound like "ksssssssshhhhhhhhh" and then basically forcing them to yell their script over and over.

I have also destracted them with small talk and questions unrelated to the product, keeping them on the defensive until I just say, "ok talk to you later", the beginners will fall for this because they are so far from the script they don't know what else to do. Wait a minute, I was supposed to sell him something!

Answering with a goofy voice or foreign accent, then randomly changing to a completely different voice is always entertaining.

Get really excited about their product! "No way! You mean I get unlimited nights and weekends? And get to keep my car?" Interrupt them with a "yeehaaw", etc. then without losing any of your extreme enthusiasm, tell them you are not interested. What the??

Ok, my sense of humor is a bit twisted...sorry

We signed up for the "do not call list" and I must admit that the telemarketer traffic is almost nil. Sort of disappointing in a way.

 

[Tod]

My favortie was totally by accident.

I was home sick and a pair of nice ladies were at my front door intent on telling me about the wonders of j-witnessism and instead of going on and on and on as is the norm, they left quite promptly and politely.
As I closed the door, I noticed a light breeze and realized that my bathrobe was not tied closed.
:yikes: :yikes:

It work so well that it's too bad I'm just a tad to modest to do it on purpose :p

 

[Patman]

I had the J-witness boys show up at my door ONCE when I lived in a neighborhood, I live in the middle of sticksville now but more on that in a moment...

The sceen: We're having a cook out in the back, have plenty of beers with our neighbors from across the street.
KNOCK-KNOCK (I have a working door bell)
"Hello sir could we take a few minutes of your time?"
"No thanks guys."
"Blah, blah, blah, our savior blah, blah, blah,. Did you know in the book blah, blah, blah..."
"Uh maybe I wasn't clear. Go away!"
"Well would there be a better time to come back and discuss blah, blah, blah..."
"I don't think so, unless you can bring 2 black cats and some goat blood. See were Satanic and if you'd like I could tell you guys all about it...Oh OK see ya' around."
LOL! my neighbor was on the floor laughing and his wife almost pee'd her shorts.

The sceen: New digs where you pass the kid from Deliverance playing the banjo and your almost to my house.

"Hello I didn't realize anybody lived back here, you sure are out here, I was lost and about to turn around."
"Really? That's sort of why we built here, yes we are, please feel free to turn around in my drive anytime."
"Well anyway I'm selling these frozen prepared meals, we deliver them to you."
"I see, not interested though, thanks."
"Oh but I'm sure your wife would like to spend less time in the kitchen."
"I doubt that, see I keep her chained up in the garage when I'm not hungry."
(Our Aussie starts to bark upstairs, sounds like he'd eat 2 salemen and their car but he'd really just lick you to death.)
"You have a dog?"
"Yeah he's a pit bull and it's sounds like he just woke up and wants some raw meat you better go."
(slammed the door just as the killer puppy hit the bottom of the stairs, looked out the window and the salesman was almost in his truck.)

Phone sales:
"Hello, can I speak to Mr. Patman?"
"He's busy right now eating dinner. Can I get your number at home and have him call you back when your eating dinner?"
"Sure it's 1.800......"
"That's your HOME number? What time do you eat dinner?"
"Oh, sorry to bother you."

Come to my world and they have to play my game by my rules! :laugh:

 

[MXGirl230]

I had the J-witness girls come to our old house. It's late in the day and I'm running VERY late to meet Phil for dinner at his work. I was putting some letters in the mailbox, I'm parked at the end of my driveway truck still running, door wide open. I had seen them walking down the sidewalk and was trying very quickly to get back in the truck to get away. Well traffic didn't see it my why. I start to cross the street and see they are standing at my truck...waiting. I finally am able to cross, not even across the road and they start in on their talk. I get to my truck door and I'm like I'm sorry we're Catholic. (I get in and shut the door...dang window was still down) They are like oh, no WE'RE sorry! I was like why? Oh because you don't know the truth. I was like what are you talking about? WE don't go door to door selling our religion and handing out bibles. They stood there not sure what to do. Unfortunately I had to sit at the end of the driveway waiting for traffic to clear again. They started walking. I finally get on the road and smile and wave as I pass by. Never saw those people on the road again.

 

[Uchytil]

J-W's, No problem, Since I live in the middle of nowhere, and I'm usually in the garage tearing something apart when they show up, I just listen to them. Then I ask for one of them to get a 17mm from the tray, or a few rags to help wipe.....At that point they mention it's time to move on and leave. I keep the literature just to keep them on their toes, LOL! Funny thing, my first riding buddy, I believe it was 1972, was a J-W and his family seemed cool enough, they never said anything to me other than do want a cookie, or sandwich, or whatever else they could scrape up for huingy boys, They were kinda strange though (to a kid), they had a tent they went in to do their reading (religious). They (yes everyone) also liked to drink milk mixed with molasses - every day. My first riding buddy!

If I even pick up the phone for a t-marketer I just tell them I'm busy and could they please give me thier home phone number so I could call them back later. They just love that!

 

[BSWIFT]

I was offered a deal on 5 packages of "septic system treatment". The caller just went into his speal like he was practicing in front of a mirror. After about 5 mins, I told him I was a purchasing agent for Wal Mart but I was at my weekend home. I gave him an order for 5 rail cars full of this stuff and a ficticious extension and job title for him to contact on the following Monday. My buddy fell out of his chair laughing, literally!