The garage is supposed to be mine!

Mully · Feb 8, 2002

There is one item that I didn't notice mentioned anywhere in this thread. The can of the all magical "Wife-be-Gone" (aka: carb cleaner or brake cleaner) is a must in every attached garage in this country. Next time the wifely unit enters the male domain, get a can out and start spraying a part to clean it. It takes but a few seconds for that lovely aroma to drive her from your
manly-mans area. And one good application lasts up to 30 minutes.

:confused:

Mully

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

Ah yes, the aromas. I love making the garage smell like gas. She won't even open the door to the house. "What's that smell, arrrggghhhh!" That's the smell of garage honey, leau de garage.
Elk

Patman · Feb 8, 2002

Shooooot I can ensure total evacuation and she won't even go THROUGH the garage for a week or more! Any of the following are highly effective.
-Diesel fuel = good parts cleaner in a pinch and sure to send them packin' for a day or two.
-VP MR2 racing fuel = All I need to do is mix some up for the trials bike or just fire it up in the garage and I have a 3-5 day clear zone.
-SeaDoo Lube = The most Godawful smellin' stuff next to a paper mill you will every find! A one second squirt of this stuff is a sure 7 day free pass. I sprayed it on my industrial sprinkler 4 weeks ago OUTSIDE and she could smell it in the house for a week! Yeah this here is secret weapon stuff boys plus it works pretty well on the SeaDoo Jet boat too!:D

I am considering packaging the 3 fragrances for sale so that we can once again roam free and scratch at will in our own zone.What do you think of Perfume de' Patman for a name?

On a much sadder note my trusty smoker/grill fell victom to a nasty accident with the John Deere loader and I fear I may need to put it out of it's misery and seek a replacement. NO!!! It will not be one of those outdoor stoves either, must make real fire with wood and charcoal Uggg.

XRpredator · Feb 8, 2002

Originally posted by Patman
It will not be one of those outdoor stoves either, must make real fire with wood and charcoal Uggg.

You don't go for propane? Like Hank Hill says: "Taste the meat, not the heat!" I figured all Texans were like the guys on King of the Hill. :p

And as for garage clearing smells, just gimme a bowl of chili, and I'll take care of it! :eek:

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

Are you still able to do that after the "snippage"?
Elk

70 marlin · Feb 8, 2002

just stomp your feet real loud and say OK honey

I back the truck into the garage and start loading up.. I prioritize by seniority and how visible the item is.. Then in the truck it goes and off to the dump..

been there. almost cost me a divorce. only worked once for her though, next time I said at least I will be able to clean the basement :p I have a nice new pole barn 24' x 32' I diesel it once a week! I alway say sure honey you can store any thing you want in the barn, she will not even go near the place :cool: grilling, we must stick together on this one there no room to stray from this line cross never!!! charcoal/gas/ fire wood it's our manly right! furniture? momma went and bought $3500 dollars worth of italian leather furniture. I'm thinking Jr #1 getting a new bike! or maybe a little concrete. for the barn ?

dell30rb · Feb 8, 2002

I to am blessed to have an entire garage to myself. I have about 2800 sq. feet of garage (heated and enclosed) All to myself!!! I have one 1800 sq ft. shed in the back of our yard, and 2 other rooms make up the space. The 1800 sq. ft. back building is used for a R/C car track, and one room has the trailer in it, and the other is where I wrench on anything I please (the bikes are also kept in there). I have another room on the garage, but thats "Cappi's Turf"
(my dog) she gets half the room and the other half is mine, with an oil changing pit!

How am i so lucky? The guy who lived here before us had about 10 antique cars, and he used the garages to maintain them. My parents have the carport to park their cars in, and the rest is mine! (and my dogs)

DANIEL JOSEPH · Feb 8, 2002

Originally posted by bbbom

You guys need to learn to share! :p

NO WAY The garage is mine and I'm not sharing it. I am however a nice husband and let her park her car in there when it snows. (This way I don't have to clean it off for her in the A.M.)

Patman · Feb 8, 2002

Had me going for a minute dell30rb "How's this guy have all this guys space?" :think then I see your just a squatter. Check back with us in about 20 years and we'll see what kind of space ya' got. ;)

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

"A squatter", you're killing me!!!:):)

zio · Feb 8, 2002

My goodness. I am taken back. How is it all you have these taj mahals? Wow. I could put up with 1/3 of the bed, no closets and lost remote priveledges for one of those. What's it like? (well, crap- I'm dealing with those already).

Shoes, clothes, packratting. Huh. I know those. Seems my queen went to school with all yours. If that's the case then Elk- your wife really does know what's in each box. I bet she could tell you what store she bought them at, how much she paid (the real amount, not how much she told you the first time), and what matching purses she has stashed to go with them. If she's particularly versed in the black magic like mine- she can even tell you which wedding she wore them to last and what that b*tch wore as well (why is it "that b*tch" is always following your wife around? How come they can't just be nice to each other?).

But hey- at least she doesn't cook or clean!

(hey- whatcha all gonna do to keep your wife busy until this thread runs its course? I know mine peeks here once in a while).;)

holeshot · Feb 8, 2002

that's tough

.
My three car garage, all that's in it (which isn't much) and the house attached, is all mine and I'm the God of my domain. The "wife-be-gone" can worked eight years ago, when the real estate market in SoCal crashed and most people's property became worthless (or at least worth less). Of course, being the male in the deal, I got everything that was worthless.

Most of you guys have problems - seems you took a misguided path at one time or another.

Now, if I could just get my daughter to move her bicycle, so I'd have a little more room......:mad:

VermontCR125 · Feb 8, 2002

:eek: I feel your pain. Heaven help us who feel what is ours is ours. My wife feels we are such a team( kids included) that what is ours is ours and what is mine ( space etc ) is ours( hers) . What is hers is of course hers . She has cleaned up parts and thinking she has done me a favor has lost:
1) special 6,8,10 mm bolts ( hard to replace)
2) gaskets/cleaning supplies/etc,etc,etc,etc,etc
3) She won't let me burn excess gas I must bring it immediately t get it dsiposed of .... that costs money!!!!!
4) Icould go on and on

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

I get this eerie feeling that when she looks at my bike or my el camino, she sees dollar signs! She makes comments like, "If you sold that thing, I could get granite." Or, "That el camino could get me a new kitchen." This scares me, she really freaks me out. We see art, she sees presidents!
Elk

NVR FNSH · Feb 8, 2002

Originally posted by a454elk
OK, I had to flame this. Let me see a show of hands,,,who thinks their garage is actually theirs, and not the wife's!? Here's the deal. She said that she will decorate the house how she wants and the garage is mine! Wow, what a deal, I think I just got juked! So this is what I did. I set up the stereo system out there, the Dish TV, the microwave, the pancake griddle, the fryer and the El Camino. Sounds great right? WRONG!

She said that she still has a space for her car in there. But I can't leave my stuff on the counters in the kitchen. What's wrong with this picture? It gets worse. When she doesn't want something in the house, guess where it goes. Right, IN THE GARAGE! And the hits keep on coming. Now, she traded in her car and got a burb, well it doesn't fit in the garage. Guess what, she says that space is STILL hers! She stores crap right in the middle of where her car is supposed to go. Am I off base here or do I have a legitimate flame? Need your help, guys only. Unless the women want to back me!:):)

I had to mark off the garage with caution tape so she wouldn't venture into my area! It worked for a while until she said she was with the Press and was allowed by law to go in. What a bunch of poop! She said my garage looks like poop and I need to clean it up. I sweep the floors daily so she won't track anything into her house. I think I'm gonna lock the garage door so she has to use the front door. That's an idea, then she won't comment about my kingdom anymore.

I feel much better now, thanks. I have to go so I can clean HER area too!

Garaged Elk in Anaheim

As I read this I thought maybe my wife had made good on her threat to divorce me and move back to SoCal. Elk - I'm afraid we are married to the same woman. Your wife isn't a 5'11" German red head, is she?

Right now, half of my two car garage is taken up by a makeshift workbench for the wife - 4x8 sheet of plywood on sawhorses - so she can strip/paint/varnicsh the railings and banisters. Been out there for 3 weeks now.

Brian

Lutz · Feb 8, 2002

This thread makes me gulp a bit...I am to be married next fall. I like to think that I won't be a victim of the what's her's is her's and what's mine is her's too. We'll see what is to come...

I think I'm safe though, as I will pay for my toys and all things related, and she doesn't take much interest in them, so I should be able to have a comfortable garage/work area. On the other hand, she does like alot of flouffy crap that just takes up space in the bedroom and such, like the tons of pillows and crap that you just have to throw on the floor at night to sleep in the bed. On the other hand, she doesn't spend much time in the kitchen, and there's no way she'll use the grill. On the other hand, she doesn't do much cooking for me either. On the other hand...

Well, hopefully we will be able to compromise to suit both of us. I've seen it happen. On the other hand, I've seen the other side of the coin, too. On the other hand, I can be ruthless if I need to be.:p

All the horror stories make me afraid... :ugg: Please tell me I don't have to be afraid.:scream:

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

That's scary, she is talking about re-doing the bannister!!!!! AHHHHHH They are all connected! She IS 5'10" and German but not sure about the hair, changes daily!:):) She starts a project like painting then gets discouraged. It sits there until I take it over or she hires someone to finsih.
Elk

XRpredator · Feb 8, 2002

Originally posted by Lutz
. . . On the other hand . . . On the other hand . . . On the other hand . . . On the other hand . . . On the other hand . . . On the other hand . . .

How many hand's you got, Lutz? :confused:

I think we need to change your name to "The Octopus"!

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

Be afraid, be very afraid. You THINK she has no interest in what you have, but she really does. It's a ploy to throw you off. Just wait until she wants to buy something and you are little short on the cash. Just wait and see what she suggests. Your not so interesting toys are suddenly the topic of conversation, even if you bought them prior to the day of togetherness.

Good luck
Elk

Hey, the more hands the better!

a454elk · Feb 8, 2002

Well I'm off. Gotta go to the Roman house and prepare for the new fridge that's coming. Like the old one wasn't good enough. Now she has to have one that looks like the friggin cabinets. If I get a couple of barley pops in me, I won't be able to find it. Maybe there's a hidden agenda there? And to boot, there was already a space for a 42" wide mother of all mother refridgerators. But noooo, she had to have the 48" big bertha! Now I'm short on cabinets cause I had to rip them out. And guess where they ended up, yep, in the garage!!!! She thinks I'm gonna keep them out therre also. Yeah right. She thinks someone will buy them at our infamous yard sale. Like some dork is going to come by and see them in the driveway and have to have them! "Hey honey, check it out. Those dang cabinets will look just fine on our kitchen, whatdoya think, huh?" NOT!

Man, if she sees this, I'm toast. Have to make room in the garage for a bed.:)

Good luck my brothers, hope this post continues.
Elk

holeshot · Feb 8, 2002

Originally posted by Lutz
This thread makes me gulp a bit...I am to be married next fall.

All the horror stories make me afraid... :ugg: Please tell me I don't have to be afraid.:scream:

Be afraid, be very afraid....:eek:

Ooooops....Elk already posted that - LOL

Lutz · Feb 8, 2002

:

Be afraid, be very afraid. You THINK she has no interest in what you have, but she really does.

Actually, that's one thing that I have going for me...I have thought about selling my 75 Duster, but she has always said that I shouldn't; I think she actually likes that car. On the other hand, maybe that's just her way of keeping it around until she wants something... She knows the dirtbike is going nowhere...ever (sentimental value). And if she ever suggests selling any of my stuff to get something for her, I'll say "you buy it."

On the other hand, maybe this is just wishful thinking and I'm in deep doo-doo.

How many hand's you got, Lutz? I think we need to change your name to "The Octopus"!

There, now I've used all eight! :confused

zilla · Feb 8, 2002

Garbage Sale! Why Elk I thought I was the only victem of that ploy.. My lady actually expects me to help with the thing.. And get this.. It'd be cheaper to haul the stuff to the dump. I usually get in mucho trouble here also cause she starts lookin fer all that junk I hauled off on the sly.. Yes she saves what doesn't sell.. Go figure.

Don't worry about the fridge either, you have to learn to barter .. One year I traded the installation of new doors and storm doors front and rear for a new 81 Husky.. Trouble is I got the bike but had to install the doors before I could ride.. That fridge oughta be worth sumpin really nice.:p

zilla

zio · Feb 8, 2002

Brian- You're supposed to finish their projects. Didn't you know that already?;)

Ladies- chill out. We're venting. We love you, respect you, and really don't mean it. It all stems from our own insecurities & homophobias. You're good.

NVR FNSH · Feb 8, 2002

Originally posted by a454elk
She starts a project like painting then gets discouraged. It sits there until I take it over or she hires someone to finsih.
Elk

We are married to the same woman. She hasn't made you hire someone to finish any of her projects yet? How long you been married to her?

Lutz - be afraid. My wife used to say she liked my CJ-7 - now she's trying to peddle to my friends. At least my friends are standing by me - they tell her she's asking too little for it:scream:

Brian

The garage is supposed to be mine!

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