Thursday Humor.

[biglou]

Some of these are new to me. Found these on ThumperTalk, of all places. Enjoy:

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease the doctor gave her 13 years to live.

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she dances she makes the band skip.

Yo Mama's So Fat....she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.

Yo Mama's So Fat....her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw her peanuts.

Yo Mama's So Fat....her driver's license says" Picture continued on other side."

Yo Mama's So Fat....the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot dogs.

Yo Mama's So Fat....all the restaurants in town have signs that say "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama".

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.

Yo Mama's So Fat....she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.

Yo Mama's So Fat....she's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.

Yo Mama's So Fat....I had to take a train and two buses just to get on her good side.

Yo Mama's So Fat....her nickname is "DAAAMN!!"

Yo Mama's So Fat....she has to iron her pants on the driveway.

Yo Mama's So Fat....she's on BOTH sides of the family.

Yo Mama's So Fat....she could sell shade.

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she crosses the street, cars look out for her.

Yo Mama's So Fat....her blood type is Ragu.

Yo Mama's So Fat....she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.

Yo Mama's So Fat....when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.

Yo Mama's So Fat....her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters.

 

[IrishEKU]

:) :) :)

 

[YZ Joust]

Remeber the big fat chick on Duece Bigalo? I unfortunatly work w/ a chick that looks identical to that chick only she has hairy legs and pits.... OMG, it's so nasty... ;) With that said I offer the following:

Yo Mamma So Ugly...

just after she was born, her mother said "Oh, what a treasure!" and her father said, "Yeah, now let's go bury it."

when she joined the ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals.

she looked out the window and was arrested for mooning.

they push her face into dough to make Halloween cookies.

they didn't even give her a costume when she auditioned for Star Wars.

instead of putting the bungee cord on her ankle, they put it on her neck.

she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.

when she walks into a bank, they turn the surveillence cameras off.

her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her.

her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dog to play with her.

when she walks down the street people say, "Damn, is it Halloween already?"

the government moved Halloween to her birthday.

if ugly were bricks, she'd have her own projects.

they pay her to put her clothes on in a strip club.

she made an onion cry.

they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.

when they took her to a beautician, it took 12 hoursfor a quote.

she tried to a bath but the water jumped out.

even Rice Krispies won't talk to her.

Ted Dansen won't date her.

on Halloween she Trick or Treats via phone.

she had to drunken her baby to brest feed it.

she turned Medusa to stone.

people go as her for Halloween.

when she sits in sand (like on a beach) cats try to bury her.

she scares the roaches away.

I heard your dad first met her at the pound.

 

[bsmith]

Yo Mama's So Fat- but it's all McDonalds fault for not telling her, her Big Mac with extra Cheese, Bacon, and Mayo with my super sized Fry, and diet Pepsi(with free refil) had Fat :confused:

 

[High Lord Gomer]

Yo Momma So Fat...

...her butt look like two pigs fightin over a Milk-Dud!

..when she steps on the scale, it says, "One at a time, please."