You know you're living in the new Millennium when:

yarbonwick

Sponsoring Member
Joined
Mar 7, 2000
Messages
674
Likes
0
#1
1. You try to enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in
years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your
family of three.
4. You e-mail your buddy who works at the desk next
to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends
is that they do
not have e-mail addresses.
6. When you go home after a long day at work you
still answer the phone
in a business manner.
7. When you make phone calls from home, you
accidentally insert a "9"
to get an outside line.
8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and
worked for three
different companies.
9. Your company's welcome sign is attached with
Velcro.
10. Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.
11. You learn about your redundancy on the 11 o'clock
news.
12. Your biggest loss from a system crash was when you
lost all of your
best jokes.
13. Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do
your job.
14. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more
likely to get
long-service awards.
15. Board members salaries are higher than all the
Third World countries
annual budgets combined.
16. Interviewees, despite not having the relevant
knowledge or
experience, terminate the interview when told of the
starting salary.
17. Free food left over from meetings is your staple
diet.
18. Your supervisor gets a brand-new state-of-the-art
laptop with all the
latest features, while you have time to go for lunch
while yours boots
up.
19. Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're
in the hospital.
20. There's no money in the budget for the five
permanent staff your
department desperately needs, but they can afford four
full-time
management consultants advising your boss's boss on
strategy.
21. Your relatives and family describe your job as
"works with
computers".
AND THE CLINCHERS ARE...
22. You read this entire list, and kept nodding and
smiling.
23. As you read this list, you think about forwarding
it to your
"friends".
24. It crosses your mind that your jokes group may
have seen this list
already, but you don't have time to check so you
forward it anyway.
25. You got this email from a friend who never talks
to you anymore,
except to send you jokes from the net!
 
Joined
Feb 8, 2000
Messages
3,136
Likes
0
#3
That is hilarious and soooo true, especially the last part! :)

17. Free food left over from meetings is your staple
diet
Oh man was that true at my last job! Those fools spent a whopper on catered lunches for everything! We bitched about it plenty in the Acct. dept but still managed to fend off the Engineers for the leftovers! :p
 

Offroadr

Ready to bang some trees!
Joined
Jan 4, 2000
Messages
5,222
Likes
23
#4
That is soo true in the IT world! i sentit to my staff and told them not to pay attention to #13 and 17 ( got a new laptop last week :p )
 

LoriKTM

Super Power AssClown
Joined
Oct 4, 1999
Messages
2,220
Likes
4
Location
New Mexico
#5
Are you sure you don't work here, Yarbo?? :eek:
 

JuliusPleaser

Too much of a good thing.
Joined
Nov 22, 2000
Messages
4,392
Likes
0
#6
I keep trying to open my apartment door with my truck's keyless entry remote. :think
 
Joined
Sep 30, 2000
Messages
95
Likes
0
#7
A few years back, my mother-in law (90 yrs old then), came to visit for a few weeks. Every morning, her breakfast was the same - instant oatmeal. One morning I got up about an hour later than she did. When I went into the kitchen for coffee, she was sitting there waiting for me (for an hour) because she couldn't remember how to work the microwave to heat the water. I said,
"mom, why didn't you just heat the water in a pot on the stove?". She said,
"oh yeah, I forgot about that." :(

Joy
 
Joined
Jan 4, 2001
Messages
105
Likes
0
#8
My .02 cents

26. DRN replaces the need to buy magazines for your information.

27. E-mail is you communication of choice, even over the phone.
 

70 marlin

Mi. Trail Riders
Joined
Aug 15, 2000
Messages
2,963
Likes
0
#10
27 out of 27

28© you answer to the puter, insteed of a boss©
29© you look for alfa neumeric combo's of eight digits, for new passwords
30 your kid brags about there high performance puter insteed of there car©
 

XRpredator

AssClown SuperPowers
Damn Yankees
Joined
Aug 2, 2000
Messages
13,511
Likes
19
#11
31) Your 3-year old daughter knows more "dot-com" sites than you do . . .:confused:
32) Your 6-year old son teaches his grampa how to run the new computer (and he can also kick your butt at Motocross Madness!)
 

bsmith

Wise master of the mistic
Joined
Jun 28, 2001
Messages
1,782
Likes
0
#12
Free Lunch- Been there Done That, After 3 RIF's they finally ended it.

New Laptop- Just Got it!
After 2 months of slow time I think I could give the 6 year old a run for his money on Motorcross Madness:o

I at least can do what I manage;)