You're so ugly!

BadgerMan

Mi. Trail Riders
Jan 1, 2001
2,479
10
You're so ugly, when you walk into the bank they turn off the cameras.

If ugliness were bricks, you would be the Great Wall Of China.

You're so ugly, you went to a haunted house and came out with an application.

If ugliness was a crime, you'd get the electric chair.

You were so ugly at birth, your parents named you $hit Happens.

You're so ugly, you could model for death threats.

You're so ugly, when you were born they put tinted windows on your incubator.

You're so ugly, you have to sneak up on your mirror.

You're so ugly, when you look in the mirror your reflection turns to stone.

You're so ugly, when you sit in the sand the cats try to bury you.

You're so ugly, your doctor is a vet.

You're so ugly, when you were born the doctor took one look at you and slapped your parents.

You're so ugly, you stuck your head out of the car window and got arrested for mooning.

You're so ugly, your pet name is Scooby-Doo.

Your girl is so ugly, you gave her a hickey and got a mouthful of fur.

You're so ugly, you have to Trick or Treat by phone.

You're so ugly, when your mother went into labor your father went into shock.

I know why you look like a horse, because I saw your mother grazing in the field.

You're so ugly, when we play peek-a-boo - first I peeked, then I booed.

You're so ugly, you can sink your face in dough and make monster cookies.

You're so ugly, they call you Taco Bell, when people see you they run for the border.

You're so ugly, you make onions cry.

You're so ugly, the tide wouldn't bring you in.

You're so ugly, I took you to see the zookeeper and he said, "Thanks for bringing him back."

You're so ugly, you mother had to get drunk before she breast fed you.

You're so ugly, you went to a freak show and got a permanent job.

You're so ugly, the police sketch artists are afraid to draw you.

You're so ugly, when you get sick they call the vet.

You're so ugly, you make blind kids cry.

You're so ugly, farmers use your picture as a scarecrow.

You're so ugly, every time you go out you get chased by the dog catcher.

You're so ugly, you can't hail a bus.

You're so ugly, they call you Moses because every time you step in the lake, the water parts.

You're so ugly, you give Freddy Kruegger nightmares.

You're so ugly, when you threw a boomerang it didn't come back.

You're so ugly, when you went to the zoo they refused to let you out.

You're so ugly, you can't get a date off the calendar.

You're so ugly, when your mother went into labor the doctors went on strike.

You're so ugly, your last name is Link and your first is Missing.

You're so ugly, people put your picture in their car window as an anti-theft device.

You're so ugly, that you can turn milk into yogurt, just by looking at it.

You're so ugly, people create a Jackson Pollock style painting when they spew on the floor.



I think that about covers it.............did I forget any? LOL! :moon:

:yeehaw:
 

Rooster

Today's Tom Sawyer
Damn Yankees
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Aug 24, 2000
3,292
1
I just want to know where you saw a picture of me........ :) Dayum I am ugh-leee!!! :)
 

VintageDirt

Baked Spud
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Jan 1, 2001
3,043
9
If I wuz any uuglier, I woulda had to been twins.

Iz soooo uugly, I could make a frieght train take a dirt road.
 

JuliusPleaser

Too much of a good thing.
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Nov 22, 2000
4,392
0
A classic:

You're so ugly, your parents had to tie a pork chop around your neck so the dog would play with you.
 

BadgerMan

Mi. Trail Riders
Jan 1, 2001
2,479
10
I am so ugly, my mom sat me in the corner and fed me with a slingshot!
 
B

biglou

I'm uglier than a hat full of ***holes.

I'm uglier than a mud fence.

I'm uglier than homemade soap.
 

a454elk

Mexicutioner
LIFETIME SPONSOR
Jun 5, 2001
7,529
18
Twinny is just plain uuuuuuuuuugaaallllllly!!
 

Vic

***** freak.
LIFETIME SPONSOR
May 5, 2000
4,008
0
If I had a dog as ugly as you, I'd shave his a*s and make him walk backwards. :eek:
 
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