RM_guy

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Nov 21, 2000
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Why men aren't secretaries:

Husband's note to his wife:

"Doctor's Office Called.....they said Pabst beer is normal."
 

XRpredator

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Aug 2, 2000
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Hold on there now! I'm a secretary!

That's right ladies, your friendly neighborhood XRpredator, all 6'6" 270 lbs of him is a secretary!

Now I'm feeling oppressed!

And I know how to spell "pap"
 

XRpredator

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Aug 2, 2000
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Easy there spunky!:silly:

I may be a secretary, but I can still put the hurt on ya!
 

Strick

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Nov 8, 1999
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XRP - The topic is do you want to laugh. I'll my post did just that (at your expense of course). Only kidding! I would expect the same wise comment coming my way from you!!;)

Hey, get that phone will ya?:eek:
 

XRpredator

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Aug 2, 2000
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(don't sweat 'er, I'm laughing)

Now excuse me while I get the freaking phone!:silly:

Come on ladies, help a guy out here!:(
 

LoriKTM

Super Power AssClown
Oct 4, 1999
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Aw, it sounds like you're doing just fine, XRsweetie!

Would you mind making some coffee after you're finished on the phone? :confused:
 

XRpredator

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Aug 2, 2000
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You chickadees are just lovin' this, ain'tcha?

Go ahead <sniff>, I can take it! <sniff, sniff>:D
 

XRpredator

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Aug 2, 2000
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Actually, I got a stupid e-card from my pest of a brother--though there were threats of flowers and such.

My wife gave me the best present, though . . .;)
 

gospeedracer

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Are you an Executive/Admin Assistant? (I think Secretary is outdated/non pc these days) If so I do not envy you. In your defense , based on my experience at my previous place of employment, it takes a certain kind of person with some serious cahones to be one, especially an Executive Assistant. I sure as heck couldn't do it and I think they more than deserve the very good pay they get to put up with the bs they do. Next time "Secretary's Day" rolls around maybe we should all pitch in and send XRP a very large case of beer! ;)

** uhh, nevermind, just took a gander at your profile. :confused: still want that case of beer anyway? ;)
 
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Michelle

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Oct 26, 1999
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Aimee, I think we should send him a cask of wine, beer is sooo masculine. (sorry can't afford the bottled wine, but no matter, we'll send a paper bag to go with the wine bladder ;)) I guess we could send him some dinky glasses to go with it?

Oh XRP, while you're picking up the drycleaning, could you get me some food. Oh, I've got some bills to be paid to while you're out.

See what you started RM hehehe
 

RM_guy

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Hey XRP, you wouldn't happen to be Blonde, would you?

A blonde pushes his/her BMW into a gas station. She/he tells the
mechanic, "It died."
After he works on it for a few minutes, it's idling smoothly.
She/he says: "What's the story?"
He replies: "Just crap in the carburetor."
She/he says, "How often do I have to do that?"
 

CNM

Sponsoring Member
Dec 28, 1999
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Haaa Haaaa!!! You guys crack me up!

XRP- Aimee beat me to the dry cleaning reply. But my truck could use an oil change. You don't mind doing that at lunch do you? ;) Just kidding!
 

XRpredator

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Aug 2, 2000
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Originally posted by gospeedracer
Next time "Secretary's Day" rolls around maybe we should all pitch in and send XRP a very large case of beer! ;)

That would be awesome! It'd almost be as good as the present my little lotus blossom gave me!;)

To clarify--I am the Secretary (note the capitalization) of the Highway District. I do have to answer the phone, get the mail, etc., but I make no ones coffee! If they want it, they make their own--I don't drink the hot bitter water anyway. I'm also the Treasurer, so I pay the bills and do payroll for about 30 employees. It's almost an appointed position--local government and all that crap. I could actually use an "administrative assistant"!

And I'm not blonde, just a little thinner up top . . .:(

Probably not the best lookin' secretary in the country, either . . . But I bet I'm the biggest!

Man, I could sure put that case o' beer to good use :think

Now, I'm ready for more "personal attacks" . . . I got big shoulders, so I can take it!:p

As far as the dry cleaning goes, do I just throw it in the back of the pickup with the bike when I go get it?:D
 
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longtime

Member
Oct 7, 1999
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I had no idea, XRP. Now you just go ahead and capitalize the S in Secretary, if that makes you feel better, okay? And don't worry about any of the other ladies who make fun of your size -- I'm sure they're just jealous of your girlish figure.

ps Does this mean you're not Ned Beatty? The boys in the Flame Room will be so disappointed. :p
 

RM_guy

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Nov 21, 2000
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Originally posted by XRpredator
And I'm not blonde, just a little thinner up top . . .:(
I like to refer to it as "transparent" hair color:silly:

Maybe you should use this technique for hireing road crews...

There was a Midwestern phone company that was to going hire one team of
telephone pole installers and the boss had to choose between a team of
blondes
and a team of brown-haired guys.

So the boss said to both teams: "Here's what we'll do. Each team will
be
installing poles out on the new road. The team that installs the most
poles
gets the job." Both teams headed right out. At end of shift, the
brown-haired
guys came back and the Boss asked them how many they had installed and
they
said they'd installed 12 poles. 45 minutes later, the blondes came
back in
and they
were dragging. The boss said, "Well, how many poles did you guys
install?"
The team leader wiped his brow and sighed, "We got three in."

The boss gasped, "Three? Those guys put 12 in!"

"Yeah," said the blond leader, "But you should see how much they left
sticking out!"
 

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