Strange observations at the Harley Davidson 100th

[oldguy]

We are in the midst of being taken over by some counts as many as 700,000 HD riders from all over the world. Our county fairgrounds has been turned into a self contained city with a population of approximately 25,000 with sleeping accomadations varing from a $500,000 funmover to the shade under the bike.
I was assigned to patrol the facility on Thurs and Fri and noticed the following;
*No matter how hot it is (hi 80 with 90% humidity) you gotta stay cool and wear your blk leather no matter how much you are sweating
*Why do the women who should leave their tops (and support garments) love flashing everyone :silly:
*Yeah we drove 2300 miles so we could sweat off the hangover from last night in our black leathers :laugh:
*Guys in skirts (the Scottish riders contingent) are very delicate getting on and off their bikes
*HD riders like to buy cheap, shiny souveneers
*I thought Harleys changed their own oil as they go down the road so why pay $100 for an oil change
*If it is so great riding a Harley why doesn't anyone smile when they are on one :)
*The Japenese riders had 2 Kawasakis (shipped over at the tune of $2500 each) in their group of 25 riders
*South Africans sure talk a strange language even when sober
*Dam do those women think they are going to get a tan in just those short flashes at the sun (or crowd)
*The truck rental businesses locally are not going to have any trucks or trailers left when all the breakdowns leave
*2 guys on a bike just doesn't look right especially when the one in back is hugging the driver a bit to tight. :eek:
*Why does everyone out there think I asked to work "this great duty"?
*When this many bikes are in one place there are some spectacular crashes- of course several of them are cars where the idiots were watching bikes and forgetting about the road.

If you got down this far you may think I am anti Harley- not true. I hope they all had a great time and safe journeys home but please head home I have had my fill of Black Leather :thumb:

 

[Rich Rohrich]

On my way home from Zion yesterday I counted 145 Harleys heading north, what I found interesting was only about 3 or 4 of them had helmets on, and those were pudding bowl helmets. I'll never get the no helmet on the open thing.

 

[gwcrim]

Wear Leather

Variation to the SunScreen song by Lews Therman.

Custom modifications by Team Obnoxious, 5/11/99

Ladies and Gentlemen .....wear Leather.

If I could offer you only one tip for improving your life, leather would be it.

The long term benefits of leather have been proved by serious bikers over many highways and many years, whereas wearing something unreliable like shorts and flipflops means you will experience a trip to the emergency room.

There, uncaring nurses will scrub gravel out of your wounds, and doctors will dispense ineffective painkillers and meaningless advice...like telling you to trade that "murdercycle" in for a Camry.

Bull****. I will dispense some real advice right now:

Enjoy the power and beauty of your ride; If you don't already; you can fully enjoy it by doing block-long smokey burnouts in the parking lot at the local drive-in.

Trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at the photos of you and your pals on your bikes and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much fun you had and how fabulous you really looked hauling ass down the highway dressed in leather.

Leather is as sexy as you imagine.

Don't worry about what your Mom thinks; or worry, but know that worrying about what other people think is as effective as trying to scratch your nose in a blinding hailstorm at 80 m.p.h. with a full- face helmet and winter gloves on. The real troubles in your life are apt to be Volvo stationwagons, driven by some dipstick talking into his cell phone or doing her makeup; the
kind that blindside you at 4 PM on some urban roadway and then claim you crashed into THEM.

Do one thing everyday that scares other drivers... Lanesplit.

Sing into your helmet. Use mouthwash first.

Don't be reckless with other people's bikes, especially if you don't have insurance. Don't put up with people who mess with yours.... in fact, beat them with a chain.

Ride Fast.

Don't waste your money on chrome, or fancy paintjobs; spend it on racing or partying. Sometimes you're fast, sometimes you're slow. Sometimes you're hungover. The ride is long, and in the end, a cold beer tastes pretty damn good.

Remember the good rides you've had, forget the cuts and bruises; try to wear out the sides of your tires before the middle.... if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your oil changed, throw away old traffic citations.

Take chances.

Don't feel guilty if you ride faster than the posted limit ...the most
interesting people I know didn't know at 22 how to ride conservatively, all the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of saddle time.

Be kind to your passengers, you'll miss them if they fall off.

Maybe you'll crash, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have surgery, maybe you won't, maybe you'll ride a cruiser off a cliff doing 40, maybe you'll get a new motocrosser for your 75th birthday ...whatever you ride, don't congratulate yourself too much - your choices are 90% foreign,10% domestic, so are everyone else's.

Enjoy your bike, use it every way you can...don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument of pleasure you'll ever own, not counting porn sites and a fast modem.

Wrench... even if you have nowhere to do it but in your hotel room.

Read the owner's manual, even tho' you won't remember any of it.

Do not read American motorcycle magazines, they will only make you wish you'd bought a British one instead.

Get to know your brake pads, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your tires; they are your link to the pavement and the things most likely to save your butt from a nasty highside.

Understand that mechanics comes and mechanics go, but for a precious talented few you should pay them well and buy them sixpacks. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older your bike gets, the more you'll need the mechanic who worked on it when it was young and still not paid off.

Ride in New York City once, but leave before you get killed; ride in
Northern California whenever possible, but leave a plausible excuse when calling in sick for work.

Do lurid wheelies.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, traffic will get
worse, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young, gasoline was cheap, the highway patrol couldn't catch you, and Harley owners weren't all yuppies.

Respect your rev-limiter.

Don't expect anyone else to see your bike unless it has really loud pipes.

Maybe your bike has a big gas tank, maybe a smaller one; but remember, either way you'll have to make bathroom stops.

Don't mess too much with your carburetors, or by the time your done, you'll be walking home.

Be careful whose advice you buy, and save your receipts. Don't take advice from those who supply it for free, especially if they own a Britbike.

Motorcycle restoration is a form of self-torture. Doing it is a way of
pulling the past from the dustbin, degreasing it, painting over the rusty parts and dumping way more money into it than it's worth.

But trust me on the leather...

 

[WaltCMoto]

Oldguy, where are the pics? or dont I want to see them. :eek:

 

[whyzee]

Originally posted by gwcrim
Wear Leather
.
.
.
But trust me on the leather...

nice! :thumb:
nothing like getting the wife a nice pair of chaps ... and getting to see 'em on before the ride.

 

[WaltCMoto]

1 of my favorites is the thong bikini and chap combo :moon:

 

[Dane Marable]

Hey Old guy
Thanks for babysitten us. I did indeed have a great time. Due in fact to the courtious manner which we were watched over by you boys in blue.

A week before I left was the first time I rode a Harley. I was under the assumption that it would be an ordeal. And I didn't have any idea how to spell Millwalke or where the hell it was. I got to go cause my dad (he's 79) didn't want to ride in 105 degre temperatures. So my brouther got a ticket for me and we hit the road. THE Harley didn't feel like my 450EXC talk about heavy yuk! I did wear a helmet and a camel back. I've hit to many trees and been thursty. Yup I did catch some flack for my atire. To me cool is having fun regardless what the uniform of the day is.

The trip was a breeze. The veteran bikers were used up after 400 miles of so. They were in need of liquid lybation. I don't dirnk beer or such while driving high performance vehicles or Harleys. But when we parked em for the night a cool one was just the ticket. Riding in the dirt does have it's strong points I was in better shape then my new friends, they are in their 40's and I'm 58. I found the ride to be interesting and fun. I HAD A GRIN the whole time. The locals were the best I have ever seen at a motorcycle event, they really got into the fun. So if ya know anyone from Milwakee, tell em thanks for me. I still can't spell Milwalkey but I sure know where the hell it is now.

Thanks
Okie Marable

 

[Smitty]

Dane, you do any roadside revalving on that hog?

This is Mion from Draper, see you out there sometime soon.