Please read my story

150rguy

I got fat bars!
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Dec 21, 2006
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flyingfuzzball said:
all good. i really like it

i did find one thing that doesnt make sense

Mark spent the next 3 laps passing people until he was in 3rd. Bobby was in third and Landon was in 2nd.

if he is in third how is bobby in third??
lol I just noticed that.
 

JD_MXRacer

Member
Nov 27, 2006
411
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flyingfuzzball said:
all good. i really like it

i did find one thing that doesnt make sense

Mark spent the next 3 laps passing people until he was in 3rd. Bobby was in third and Landon was in 2nd.

if he is in third how is bobby in third??

i think he meant landon was in 2nd and bobby was in first
 

150rguy

I got fat bars!
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Dec 21, 2006
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dirtbike_freak is about halfway done. (Probably friday)
 

MeanorMX

Member
May 30, 2007
91
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Oh man, I just spent the last hour and a half reading the whole thing! I think I'm going to print it out :)
 
Dec 10, 2006
211
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I think I'm going to finish it tonight or tommorow morning, so then you guys will all be counting on olderndirtmom to get it back to me. So if it's not in by friday don't be mad at me :laugh:
 

scooter1130

Paragon Junkie
Damn Yankees
LIFETIME SPONSOR
May 31, 2002
1,229
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I think thats the longest it has gone so far, 3 days before somebody asked "when is the next chapter" I was starting to wonder when they would ask.
 
Dec 10, 2006
211
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Chapter 14

Here is 14.

Previously-Mark remained in first until the last lap when Blake Gopy passed him. Mark didn’t have any idea how he had caught up, but now Mark was in second. Blake increased his lead a little more. There was only one way to win. There was a huge triple that mostly only the pros were doing. Mark knew he could do it if he committed to it. It was a few corners away from the finish line. When they came up to it Blake was on the left side. Mark couldn’t believe what he was doing but he went for the triple. He soared across it, passing Blake. Blake tried to hit Mark across the last corner, but couldn’t. As Mark flew through the air on the finish line jump, he turned the upper half of his body around and pointed at Blake Gopy.

Chapter 14-

As Mark pulled off the track he saw the announcer coming over to interview him. Mark groaned. He was not in the mood to give an interview.
“That was a big jump you just did,” the announcer said.
“Yeah, well I had to get past Gopy,” Mark said sourly.
“Who would you like to thank for getting you this far?”
“I don’t know,” Mark said irritably. “The people who built that triple,” and he walked away.
“Nice interview,” Bobby said as they walked together back to their trailers.
“What place did you get?” Mark asked.
“3rd. I passed that Landon Styner,” Bobby said.
“I’ve got to get ready for Supermini,” Mark said.

When Mark walked up to the trailer he saw that there was no rear wheel on his 150.
“What happened?” Mark asked Lester. Lester just grabbed his 85 and put it on a stand and started taking off the wheel.
“Your back tire was flat.” Lester said. “So I have to put your 85 wheel on the 150.”
“Are you kidding?” Mark said angrily. “Supermini main is in like 1 race.”
“Quit talking and go to the starting gates,” Lester said.
Mark did as he was told. He felt kinda dumb standing on the starting gate with no bike. Lester hurried over to him pushing the 150. It looked funny because it had a red rim on the back and a black rim on the front. Mark hurried and got on the bike and started it. Mark knew that he was going to have to figure a way to beat Mike Steward. He looked down the gates. He saw Steward. Steward had a bag of ice on his shoulder. He remembered that he had been right behind Steward in practice when he had gone over the bars on a double. All the better for Mark.
A few minutes later the Card went up, then sideways. The gate dropped. Mark got the holeshot. Steward was behind him. Mark held off Steward until lap 6 where Mark washed out in a corner. Mark hurried back on the bike and got going again. He caught up with Steward. Then they came into the field of lapped riders.
Mark passed a lapper around a corner and felt something hit him. It was the lapped rider. Mark felt a little pain on his leg but nothing too big. Mark rode out the rest of the race in second and was still in that position when he came across the finish line. He hopped off his bike and screamed. He had jumped on to his left leg where the rider had hit him.
“What’s wrong?” Lester asked.
“My leg,” Mark said. “I can’t walk on it.”
“Hop on the bike. I’ll push you back,” Lester said. When they got back to the semi Lester walked into the trailer and brought out a pair of crutches. Mark pulled off his pants and boots and had a look at his lower leg. It was swelling. Lester felt around his leg while Mark groaned.
“You bruised the bone,” Lester said.
“Will I ride next week?” Mark asked hurriedly.
“I think so. But, you’ll just have to stay on these crutches.”

Mark walked over to Bobby’s trailer on the crutches. Bobby and Stephanie were sitting in chairs under the awning. Stephanie quickly got up and walked away. Mark took her vacated seat.
“Nice crutches,” Bobby said. “I had some of those at the beginning of the week.” Mark was about to answer when he saw the girl from his school whose brother had wanted his autograph. ‘What was her name?’ Mark racked his brain. ‘Payton!’ he remembered. Mark stared at her as she walked by.
Bobby looked in the direction that Mark was staring. “What are you looking at?”
“That girl,” Mark said still staring.
“She’s hot,” Bobby said.
“Duh!” Mark said. “She goes to my school.”
“I’m going to your school next year,” Bobby said. “Remember we’re moving to Davis.”
“Oh, yeah. I forgot,” Mark said. “Well you have no chance with her.”
“Oh yeah?” said Bobby. “And what makes you think that you have a chance?”
“Don’t be jealous just cuz I’m a chick magnet and you’re not!” Mark said laughing.
“What are you guys talking about?” a voice behind them asked. Mark spun around. Stephanie was standing there.
“Mark likes that girl,” Bobby said pointing.
“So do you,” Mark said. Stephanie walked over to the girl. They stopped and talked for a minute.
“What’s the heck is she doing?” Bobby said. A minute later she came back.
“She says she doesn’t know if she would go out with either of you,” Stephanie said.
“Why did you go and talk to her!?” Mark asked angrily. Mark stood up and stopped a boy about his age walking by. “Would you go out with her?” Mark said gesturing toward Stephanie.
The boy looked at her, then said, “Yes.”
“Keep on walking!” Mark said.

The next race was all the way in Colorado Springs, Colorado. The team was informed that they would be staying at a hotel.
“Dang,” Mark said. “It was fun staying at Jim’s house,”
“Well we don’t know anybody around Colorado Springs,” Jordan said. “When we go to the next round back in California we’ll have someone to stay with.”
They were in the car on the way to the airport. This time Jordan was going with them in the plane. Just then Mark’s cell phone rang. This had been a birthday present from his mom.
“Hello?” he answered.
“Hey.” It was Mark’s dad. “Another win, huh?”
“Yup,” Mark said. “Now I’m 2nd in points in the whole US.”
“Actually, you’re tied,” Mr. Peterson said. “That kid Chris Gillworth got 2nd this weekend.”
“Seriously?” Mark asked. “That’s awesome!”
“So let’s win another one!” his dad said.
“Yeah.”
“Listen…” Mark’s dad said. “A couple people called here wanting to make some sort of sponsorship deal.”
“Really?” Mark asked. “Who?”
“Dunlop, Smith, and Pro-Taper,”
“What!” Mark exclaimed. “Are you serious? What did you tell them?”
“I said I would have to talk to you,” Mr. Peterson said. “What do you say?”
“What are they gonna do for me?” Mark asked.
“They’ll give you their products,” Mr. Peterson said.
“In return for?” Mark asked.
“Putting their stickers on your bike, using their products and mentioning their names on the podium.”
“Okay. I accept,” Mark said.
“Okay. I’ll get back to them. Bye.”
“Bye, Dad,” Mark said.
When they loaded the plane Mark noticed it was bigger than the one they had taken before.
“Whoa!” Keenan exclaimed, “Look, They’ve got TV’s!” He pointed to the wall that separated first class seats from second class seats.
“How come we don’t get to sit first class?” Mark asked Jordan.
“Because it’s a lot more money,” Jordan said, “You’re lucky you guys even get to take the plane.”
When they got settled in their seats Mark asked: “How come TPA has 85 and 65 riders? We’re not pros like Kasey and Matt, so we can’t give you any money.”
“Well you’re promoting the business. People see you and Keenan winning on the TPA team and they think ‘Hmm I’ll try some of TPA’s products,” Jordan explained.
“Oh so we're making you more popular,” Mark said.
“Yes.” Jordan said.

The plane ride was about 3½ hours long. Mark asked Jordan if he knew what the results for 85A were in the whole United States. Jordan rummaged in his back pack and pulled out a packet of paper with the whole US results on it. He handed the paper to Mark.
This is what it said the top 2 were in 85A:


#---Name—Round1-Round2-Round3-Round4-Round5—Points –Region
72- Chris Gilworh-----1------------1-----------1------------1-----------2-------96-------SE
83- Mark Peterson----2------------1------------1------------1----------1-------96-------SW

Mark looked the results over for a minute, then flipped over to 65A. Keenan was in 3rd place. In 250 Pro Kasey was in second. And in 125 Pro Matt was in 1st. Mark turned around in his seat to look at Matt. He was reading a magazine.
“Can I read that after you?” he asked Matt.
“Sure.”
A few minutes later, Matt passed the magazine to Mark. It was the brand new edition of Dirt Rider. Mark flipped through it. He came to a page with an article about the USMXN series. He skimmed through it. It explained how the series worked. He read until he came across his name. The paragraph said:
“In the 85 class in the Western race, we saw Mark Peterson of Davis, California take the checkered flag. After getting passed, he went for a huge triple and made it, which gave him the lead of both the race and the points. In the Eastern race 85 rider Chris Symons of Florida took the win after points leader Chris Gillworth broke his front wheel. His mechanic changed the wheel out and Gillworth rallied back to take second.”



There you got. Thanks olderndirtmom for proofing this chapter.
 

150rguy

I got fat bars!
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Dec 21, 2006
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How's it a a cliffhanger?
 

150rguy

I got fat bars!
Member
Dec 21, 2006
654
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Good job by the way.
 
Dec 10, 2006
211
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Isn't anyone exept you 2 gonna read this chapter? If anyone reads it, please leave a comment so I will know someone is reading it.
 

Matt 193

Member
Dec 22, 2006
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I've been reading the stry and plot is great. The views on this thread are way up there so yea a lot of people are reading.
 
Dec 10, 2006
211
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I'm going to visit some relatives for 2 weeks, and I'll be able to acess a Computer at my grandmas house, so I should get the next chapter posted later this week.
 

olderndirtmom

Member
Apr 28, 2007
424
1
Of course we're reading it!!

db_f

Of course we're reading it!! You are doing a phenomenal job. I'm truly truly impressed! I think we just didn't want to pressure you since it is summer vacation and all. :)

But hey, we're waiting!!!

I should have more continuous dsl again. No more lags. Now... Get Busy. :nener:
 

kx125412

Member
Mar 30, 2006
341
0
I've read it since chapter one I really enjoy it. I was wondering if you got my suggestions I emailed when you had a bit of writers block. It seems like it. Keep up the good work.
 
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