Getting along with the opposite sex

[380EXCman]

I have to say though, I'm a little worried about TTRGuy!

Dont worry about him. If he can pull a chick like gospeed, then he must be doing something right. ;)

As for this relationship stuff. I have no idea how to make it all work. I credit my wife with all of its success. Alot of guys think Im lucky. They always say "Veron is lucky. His wife never has PMS. He gets to buy new bikes all the time and never has to get permission. She never spends any money on herself and to top it all off shes a nympho." I agree with them.... :)

I tend to believe that there is someone out there for all of us. All our relationships are different. Some work, some dont. In the end we have to try and do what makes ourselves happy and hopefully we all find someone who does that for us and hopefully that other person is experiencing the same thing. (A perfect match.)

As for communications. You can get a girl to say what ever you want after sex. For a guy its the opposite. We will agree to anything or say anything before sex. We tend to be the weakest right after foreplay and before...... Uh nevermind.......

FC22, Keep us posted. It will all work out for you...... Oh and the trophy picture thing... I would be willing to bet a bunch of us guys here on DRN have tried to pass you off as our girlfriend at some point or another. I know I have...... :) "Here is a pic of my girl on her new KTM. Hot aint she?"







The bike.................. ;)

 

[JuliusPleaser]

Originally posted by Ol'89r


I feel respect has a lot to do with it. You have to show respect for each other. If only one person is trying to keep the relationship together, it's not gonna work.

The blame game. Don't play the blame game. We are the masters of our own destiny. If you don't like the way things are going, take it upon yourself to change it. Don't blame the other person. Of course it is much easier to blame someone else than to take the responsibility yourself.

The little stuff. Sharla, you said there are a lot of little things. One thing I have found is, when one of you is laying in a hospital bed with a serious or life threatening injury or illness, the last thing on your mind is the little stuff. Talk out the little stuff before it gets to be big stuff.

Communication. I feel this if really the key to a relationship. Don't let things go. If there is a problem, talk it out. If you let a little problem go, it will turn into a big problem.

Keep in mind that we are completly different animals. We, (men and women), think differently, act differently, see things differently. As mentioned in a previous post, men like to fix things. When something goes wrong, we get our tool boxes out and fix it. Well, sometimes women don't want us to fix it. They just want our sympathy. Of course, men arn't programed to be sympathetic.

Ok, so I really have'nt been married for 38 years. It's only been 37. Just feels like 38. :scream:

My Wife and I are best friends, well most of the time anyway. After 37 years we still hold hands when we go somewhere together and I could not imagine life without her.

Ok, I've let out way too much information here, :eek: Back to our regular programing. :)

Ol'89r

You old guys are purty smart. I hope I have the chance to experience that kind of relationship before I die.

 

[O.T.]

hello, and sorry any sincire honest and truthful advice will only be given via e-mail. however the ladies do need respect,love,trust. i,m not saying much more but all you guys out there swearing to your ladies that you respect them, they,d probably know you would if you take down some of your hooters girls/swedish bikini team posters off the garage wall. you dont see fabio posters in her closet do you?

 

[Senior KX Rider]

Originally posted by Ol'89r


I feel respect has a lot to do with it. You have to show respect for each other. If only one person is trying to keep the relationship together, it's not gonna work.

The blame game. Don't play the blame game. We are the masters of our own destiny. If you don't like the way things are going, take it upon yourself to change it. Don't blame the other person. Of course it is much easier to blame someone else than to take the responsibility yourself.

The little stuff. Sharla, you said there are a lot of little things. One thing I have found is, when one of you is laying in a hospital bed with a serious or life threatening injury or illness, the last thing on your mind is the little stuff. Talk out the little stuff before it gets to be big stuff.

Communication. I feel this if really the key to a relationship. Don't let things go. If there is a problem, talk it out. If you let a little problem go, it will turn into a big problem.

Keep in mind that we are completly different animals. We, (men and women), think differently, act differently, see things differently. As mentioned in a previous post, men like to fix things. When something goes wrong, we get our tool boxes out and fix it. Well, sometimes women don't want us to fix it. They just want our sympathy. Of course, men arn't programed to be sympathetic.

Ok, so I really have'nt been married for 38 years. It's only been 37. Just feels like 38. :scream:

My Wife and I are best friends, well most of the time anyway. After 37 years we still hold hands when we go somewhere together and I could not imagine life without her.



Ol'89r

Very good 89r. And it doesn't hurt to spoil them too. I will be married to my wife for 26 years this week and for a long term relationship you have to remember that it is "for better or for worse" and that if you work through the bad times as a team they will be few and pass quickly. :D The good more than out weighs the bad. :) :)

 

[truespode]

Originally posted by O.T.
you dont see fabio posters in her closet do you?

My wife has quite a few posters of half-nekkid men in our bedroom. She goes to male shows a couple times a year and always brings home a picture of her sitting with the guy.

I trust my wife completely and never have even had to worry about her cheating.

All people look. Being totally honest isn't about hiding the posters but about being open with each other.

Ivan

 

[firecracker22]

Ol89er--you and your wife are lucky to have each other, and I hope that I can have that too. Reese and I have the core of what a good relationship takes, we are just working out the little things. We've been together on and off for about 3 years. For him, moving in together was a BIG committment. While I used to think I would not move in with anyone unless I was married, or at least engaged, I think for us this is a good step. I can't imagine leaping into a lifetime committment without first learning the things we are learning now.

We talked about things the other night. I know he loves me and sometimes just doesn't know what to do or say, just like I don't always know. None of us do. We'll make it though.

And for whomever accused me of man bashing, I am not. I love men and respect them for their differences from women. I was simply asking the men and women here on DRN who are more experienced than I for some advice. DRN is the biggest support group around and while it is MOSTLY about dirt bikes, it is also about other things too.

 

[Ol'89r]

Originally posted by firecracker22
We talked about things the other night. I know he loves me and sometimes just doesn't know what to do or say,B]

firecracker. That's just a man thing. :D Most of us don't know what to do or say. As men, we are trained to hide our emotions. Like it is a weakenss.

I have found that if you can't talk about something, write a letter. A lot of times you start out talking about something and soon it turns in to a yelling match. You say things that you really don't mean just to defend yourself.

If you write the other person a letter, you can put your thoughts down on paper and review it before you give it to the other person. If there are things that need changing in the letter, you have time to do this.

The other person has time to read the letter and think about its content. Even if they are mad at the time and wad the letter up and throw it in the trash, sooner or later curiosity will get the best of them and they will read the letter. If they still can't talk about it, have them write you a letter.

Luck has little to do with a relationship. Well, maybe a little. ;) It takes a lot of hard work on both sides. No matter how good your relationship is, things in life will constantly come up to test your relationship.

That's about all I have to say, I've given much to much ammunition to elk, twinnie, and that RMguy. If they see this post, I'm toast. :)

Ol'89r

 

[ktmboy]

89r'---if those guys flame you it's 'cause they have to joke around to hide their emotional weaknesses.
A guy can be tough and still be sensitive. It's too bad that movies, TV, and music all portray rude, selfish, macho men as being cool.
I prefer to break that mold--I can be as tough as the next guy and still be nice, respectful, and have morals.
Hooray for guys like you who are not afraid to say the right thing for fear of being ridiculed!
DISCLAIMER: Just because I said all this nice stuff doesn't mean I won't still poke fun at you once in awhile, 'cause I always pick on the people I like!

FC22---I think you've gotten some good advice here, and some of it I need to apply myself!

 

[jmics19067]

Don't worry all. It is a known fact that as we get older the men lose the hearing of high pitched sounds and women loose the hearing of low pitched sounds. Once you get to that point all is perfect because you never hear what the other one actually said so you just do what you think they said . If not you only argue what wasn't said ... or was it that that you argue over what you didnt hear?1? :think: :think: :think:

now if you can actually figure out what I just said then a a relationship with the opposite sex shouldnt be hard at all ;)

 

[Jeff Gilbert]

Simple solution....Just Quit!

Well, maybe that aint such a good idea after all.

 

[Vic]

Following is an excerpt from an article I read recently.

Dr. Desmond Morris, a well-known researcher and author, spent many years studying the institution of marriage and the factors that contribute to long term intamacy. A relationship that fails to survive, he said, can usually be traced to the dating days when the bond between a man and a woman was inadequately cemented. And what interfered with the bond? It was likely to be physical intamacy occuring too early in the relationship. Instead of taking the time to know each other- to talk and laugh and share lovers' secrets- the couple engaged in early physical activity. Such familiarity interferes with intamacy and weakens the marital bond.

I'm sure this will not be a popular viewpoint, but from what I've witnessed, it does appear to be borne out by the evidence.

 

[gospeedracer]

I'm not EVEN gonna get started!! :debil:

 

[Milquetoast]

Originally posted by Truespode

She goes to male shows a couple times a year and always brings home a picture of her sitting with the guy.

I've seen hunderds of those shows when I bartended in a nightclub, and let me just say that alot of stuff happens that boyfriends and husbands would be surprised to hear of. Stuff that would never happen in a legal go-go bar. I'm scarred for life, never trust anyone again! :ugg: (I'm only half-kidding on that one)

 

[Milquetoast]

Dr Desmond Morris is mainly a Zoologist who promotes such things as a "Bill of Rights for animals" and a "Animal Ten Commandments". Personally, I wouldn't spend much time listening to his relationship advice.

 

[Bruce]

Back when I was a Chippendales dancer...
.
.
.


oh wait, that's my wife's fantasy
(and I mean fantasy... couldn't be further from the truth)...
Ivan, should I be worried about my wife's fantasies?

 

[Ol'89r]

Originally posted by gospeedracer
I'm not EVEN gonna get started!! :debil:

:eek: :scream: :) :)

 

[Vic]

Originally posted by Milquetoast
promotes such things as a "Bill of Rights for animals" and a "Animal Ten Commandments".

Where the heck did you get that? Did you just make it up?

 

[MrLuckey]

This Desmond Morris?

http://www.sirc.org/about/desmond_morris.html

I just did a quick search so maybe this isn't the same guy but it appears as though he did study animals quite extensively and also man. Still unsure what any of it means though. Not too many people that I know.. ummmm well... waited too terribly long. I am sure things were different in the old days though. If I have seen any trend its people getting married too young. Of course I haven't looked at that from a monkeys point of view :)

Just kidding on the last part Vic - Couldn't resist :)

 

[Milquetoast]

We can continue this discussion on PM if you wish, or start another thread as it is not anywhere near on topic. A simple internet search will find the information you feel I "made up". Or, just click on this link... http://www.iridescent-publishing.com/RTM/morris.htm

 

[Vic]

Originally posted by TTRGuy
Not too many people that I know.. ummmm well... waited too terribly long.

I don't know many either and I see and am directly affected by the results every day.

I'm always surprised at people's unwillingness to even consider a point of view that is at odds with their own desires. I guess I shouldn't be.

 

[Vic]

Milquetoast- Thanks for the link. The page gives a clearer picture of Morris than the one you tried to paint.

 

[MrLuckey]

Hoping that wasn't directed at me but ... I definitely consider any point of view but that doesn't mean that I just take it as fact either. Heck I even consider Jaybirds point of view every now and then :)

Just kidding with ya Jaybird :p

Is it just me or do a lot of people (probably me included) seem kinda tense around here these days?

 

[XRpredator]

Oh . . . THAT guy! I've seen him on the Discovery Channel. Interesting guy to say the least.

 

[Milquetoast]

Originally posted by Vic
Milquetoast- Thanks for the link. The page gives a clearer picture of Morris than the one you tried to paint.

Or the one you tried to paint.

 

[Rooster]

I've noticed some tension just about everywhere, not just here. Perhaps the threat of more terrorist acts may be getting people all edged out. Just a theory.